5 Innovative Approaches to Understand Your Sensitive Partner in Marriage

5 min readFeb 15, 2021

HSP (Highly Sensitive Person) is a recognized behavioral pattern in humans, especially in marriages. This behavioral pattern is however difficult to locate for spouses. When either of the spouses is able to tell that his or her partner is an HSP, then half the battle against a breaking marriage is won.

Without arguing whether the other half is sensitive or not, you can make changes to your approaches towards your partner for a blissful life and strengthen the relationship for a successful marriage in which both stands to gain enormously. It takes just a few steps to a better marriage when there is some give and take.

Here are 5 Innovative things to do to strengthen your marriage — the magic keys to unlock discord in marriages with one of the partners and HSP.

Improve your Communication for Sustaining your Marriage:

Improving Communication is one of the most important ways to work on your marriage and make it a success. Finding ways to improve marriage communication can annul HSP to a vast extent. Nothing can be more important in a marriage than sharing views and agreeing to disagree and still keep the relationship up and going without any hindrance is not a herculean task; it is attainable and many couples are already doing it.

Putting an end to a debate is important if it seems that the two of you are moving in opposite directions with no sign of either giving up. Smart couples avoid getting into debates that are usually endless and don’t make any significant contribution to running the family any better in the future.

The most reason why communications go wrong is the difference in perception about a given subject. The emphasis here is on perceptions about the world outside. Here you include using the right language and words, and if you don’t understand, seek clarification and sort out the problem at its root. When you agree on the right way of using words, your engagement becomes more fruitful — you understand in clear terms what he/she means and why.

Listen with Ears Open and Cement the Bond:

Your spouse is HSP not without reason — often the reason can be traced to his/her childhood and his/her experience derived from school, family, and peer groups that shaped the subject’s behavior. Speaking about your spouse’s childhood experience will open a new world for you to explore and investigate. It becomes easy to understand the reasons behind their behavior and offer solutions or make changes yourself for concordance in the family.

Listening has its advantages: you can react appropriately, offer solutions, or guide them to find answers that have been the cause for trouble. Though it should often be able for you to bring some relief to your spouse yourself, it can otherwise also help you to find professional help for the affected partner. Listening intently and refusing to react negatively even under extreme provocation is important to emphasize your maturity.

When you listen, listen with all the care and empathy your relationship deserves. One of the commonest of mistakes why people listen is to answer at the next immediate opportunity. If you are the more composed in the relationship, then you should understand that most often spouse speaks for venting their feelings and not always for an answer or reply.

Improve Physical Relationship for Breaking Strained Relationships:

It is common knowledge that husband-wife relationships come under strain at some point in time in many marriages. What makes the strain extreme is not understanding the root cause and weeding it out on time. If left unattended, the ego will raise ahead and the relationship might start to show signs of break up. A stitch in time can save nine; start to rebuild the relationship by speaking to your partner at the earliest. Frankness and sincere willingness are the things to focus on to improve your derailed relationship back on track.

Physical intimacy is important in rebuilding relationships in marriages that are under strain. Consider taking a break from routine work and spending more time in each other’s company. Psychiatrists agree that HSPs love physical intimacy and it provides them with much needed physical relationship that is important in sustaining marriages.

A regular walk outdoors or being alone in each other’s company is great for rebuilding relationships that are showing signs of weakening.

Resolve Conflicts at the Earliest:

In families that have an HSP, the chances of frequent conflict and disagreement are common but not insurmountable. Sitting together and exchanging each other’s concerns and priorities can resolve what many people think is impossible to achieve.

Mild forms of HSP disappear over a period of time as the marriage begins to mature and couples begin to understand the futility of persisting with a conflict. What begins as mild arguments often escalate into a fiery debate, and winning a hopeless debate becomes the objective for both. This is avoidable if the non-HSP can show some constraint by not criticizing, but allowing the debate to die down.

Choosing the right time and venue is critical to resolving problems that have been simmering for a long time in the family. Creating an ambiance of giving and take and conveying this emphatically is all that it takes to close a conflict and move towards a just and honorable decision in which the HSP feels comfortable.

Don’t Raise your Voice in a Debate:

Raising one’s voice indicates that you are losing the battle for peace in the marriage. Always keep the volume down and if needed keep calm and don’t retort. As someone with an HSP spouse, it is your responsibility to take control of the situation and work for the affected individual. Compromising is not a sign of weakness — if done tactfully; it will show how much you are resilient and reveal your maturity.

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For now, signing off until the next post.

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